Meet the Premier League’s new multi-million pound signing
Posted By Rob Parker on June 23, 2009
Mickey Mouse comes to the Prem
Michael Owen might be still passing around his GCSE Graphic Design project, but there is only one Mickey desperate to get into the Premier League who has had any luck so far this summer. Mickey Mouse is coming to the Premier League! Disney-owned broadcaster ESPN has snapped up the Premier League rights which were taken from cash-strapped Setanta last week.
ESPN has twice attempted to get Premier League matches in the past but was outbid on both occasions. This time it has been successful, but it is believed to have agreed a deal to show the matches on Sky. It is possible subscribers will have to sign-up to the Disney Channel to get the matches!
If you want to entertain yourself for ten minutes, read through Michael Owen’s Brand Values and decide whether each one is more applicable to Mickey Owen or Mickey Mouse. Feel free to let us know the final score!
Fit and Healthy: Mickey 1-0 Michael.
First Class: Mickey 2-0 Michael.
Successful: Mickey 3-0 Michael.
Young: Mickey 3-0 Michael. (neither)
Dynamic: Mickey 4-0 Michael.
Committed: Mickey 5-0 Michael.
Sincere: Micky 6-0 Michael.
Clean and Fresh: The heck? Does a player’s personal hygiene even matter? Mickey 6-1 Michael.
Good looking: Mickey 6-2 Michael.
Global: Mickey 7-2 Michael.
Enthusiastic: Mickey 8-2 Michael.
Stylish: Mickey 9-2 Michael.
Respected: Mickey 10-2 Michael.
Devoted: Mickey 11-2 Michael.
Charismatic: Mickey 12-2 Michael.
Articulate: Mickey 13-2 Michael.
Technical: Mickey 13-3 Michael.
Instinctive: Mickey 13-4 Michael.
Aspirational: Mickey 13-5 Michael.
Cool: Mickey 14-5 Michael. (again, teh heck?! Cool?)
Resilient: Mickey 15-5 Michael.
15-5, there you have it.
Brilliant.
Who is going to commentate? I’m worried that Tommy Smyth will appear somewhere
no, no. he had his name legally changed to ‘Tommy Smyth, With a YYYYYYYYY’
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