1. Paul Scholes should definitely take up volleyball when he retires. We already knew he could spike and now we know he can block too. Perhaps indoor volleyball would be better than beach with your complexion, Paul.
2. The Premier League title race may not have been open again after Liverpool’s victory over Manchester United, but it certainly is after United’s defeat to Fulham. I still expect the Red Devils to hold out, but at least the run-in will be more exciting than we expected.
3. Remember the days when Liverpool could hardly buy a goal? Five this week and four last week for the big-scoring Reds.
4. Now we know where Arsenal have been going wrong – Nicklas Bendtner wanted all those chances to his head.
5. In the same way that Rafa’s rant didn’t help Liverpool, Wayne Rooney’s psycho display is hardly going to alleviate rumours that United are cracking under the pressure.
6. The Rory Delap throw is back with a vengeance. Its impact against Middlesbrough could be vital to Stoke’s survival.
7. Spurs (and Luka Modric) have finally performed at a level we had expected at the start of the season. Chelsea will not be best pleased with their timing.
8. Peter Crouch must have woken up on Saturday and thought: “I’m 6ft 7in tall. It really ought to be easier for me to score headers than bicycle kicks.”
9. Zoltan Gera woke up on Saturday and thought exactly the opposite.
10. Cocaine is not good for your penalty taking. This is not a direct observation on any particular Premier League player, of course, but we just felt able to conclude it this weekend.