Roman Abramovich set to treat Chelsea to some Real Madrid-esque spending

Posted by - June 30, 2009 - Chelsea, Transfer News and Gossip

I see your Kaka and Ronaldo, and I raise you… Sturridge and Turnbull

Chelsea fans must be wondering where it all went wrong for them. Real Madrid are set to unveil Kaka today… as a pre-cursor to their biggest signing of the summer. The new moneybags in the Premier League, Manchester City, are bickering with Samuel Eto’o about how many oilfields he needs, or something.

Meanwhile at Stamford Bridge, rumours abound that Chelsea are about to snap up their galacticos pairing of Daniel Sturridge and Ross Turnbull. Sounding a bit like a downmarket department store in a northern town, Sturridge and Turnbull will join from Manchester City and Middlesbrough respectively.

It’s all a far cry from the days of throwing £30 million on a reserve team striker, £16 million on a cokehead and about £100 million on a pick-and-mix assortment of Portuguese defenders.

Disclaimer: We know Yury Zhirkov is set to sign too – it’s a bit of fun.

  • ash

    does someone actually pay you to write this trash?

  • http://www.offthepost.info Rob Parker

    Yeah… Roman Abramovich.

  • Ala

    Turnbull?!?!

    Oh dear.

  • Blue Nut Sack

    You MOFO

  • Sayonara

    Is Ash a “closet” cheslea fan?

  • http://offthepost americano

    You guys writting are stupid Chelsea stars are getting old yeah we want a good team but how about 2 years later Drogba would be gone no Lampard so Danial Sturridge and ross turbull are young 19 year old good signings

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Usama-Waheed/899210433 Usama Waheed

    I think the Sturridge in the picture is photoshopped.

  • Joe

    Chelsea are probably watching their cash. They have a strong side and pretty much anyone who would threaten to break into it would cost big money so I wouldn’t expect to see more than one big name signing this summer. Maybe a right back or another striker but its not going to be like the summer of Ballack and Sheva. Headlines are being made by Madrid and Man City because they have to significantly strengthen to challenge for their objectives.

  • http://www.offthepost.info Rob Parker

    Usama > Nah, Paint!

  • trad

    yea lets not forget madrid lost 5-0 on aggregate to a liverpool team in the cl last year who chelsea went on to beat. i wont even mention city because they obviously need all the help they can get

  • Danno

    Fanboys who come on here and make stupid comments about a funny article just demonstrate how idiotic they are by not being able to take a joke about their own club…you’d laugh if it was about Manchester United.

    ‘Danial Sturridge’ – nice!

  • Joe

    Danno…I’m not criticizing the post…I’m saying that I wouldn’t really expect Chelsea to splash the same cash as Man City and Madrid this summer. I am not whining, being negative, or failing to “take the joke”. If that’s “idiotic” then I guess I’m an idiot.