Wayne Rooney’s career fall-back option: become a priest
Roo reveals his extremely well hidden religious side
Wayne Rooney claims he would have become a priest if he hadn’t have made the grade as a footballer. The Manchester United star said his lack of academic prowess would probably have limited his career options, but his love of religious studies lessons might have pushed him towards a life of institutionalised paedophilia.
He said: “I haven’t a clue what else I could have done. I wasn’t really the best in school. I always enjoyed RE — so maybe a priest.”
OTP can envisage Rooney building strong links with older, female members of the congregation although visiting them in brothels could be frowned upon by his bosses. Also, a nasty habit of being caught shouting the F-word every time a camera points at you could be problematic at baptisms and weddings!