If Joleon Lescott was a football blogger…

Posted by - August 17, 2009 - Everton, Manchester City, Oddballs, Transfer News and Gossip

by Joleon Lescott

David Beckham were red-carded in LA Confidential’s defeat too Seattle Sounders on Saturday. The Ex-EnGl&nd capTain was 5ent-of in the £££££££££££ 17th minute… Argghhhh!!!!!!! It’s no use. I can’t do it anymore. I Used too bee a fantastic football blogger butt last week I herd that (£££££££££££) a national newspaper wanted to sign me up. I’m so unsettled !££££££££!

I told OTP that i wasn’t in the right FRAME OF MIND to do a column this week but NoboDy ever listens to me. Ever since I fOunD out that sum one is willing to pay Me mOre monEy to do the same JOb i”m doing Now I’Ve found i CAN’t do ThE job any moore, My spelling is atroshus and the grammar ain’t not much better. ££££££££ I’m also prone to lapses of £££

£££££££££££££££££££££££££ erm, concentration.

The trouble is i’VE had my head turned. An once u’ve had your head turned it is very difficult to look at a computer screan and tipe at the same thyme. hoW can anyone expect you to go aobut your work proffessionallly when your unsettled?%.

It’s probably in everyone’s best interests if OTP let me go to the national so we can all get back to £££££££££££££££££££££ normality.

  • http://blog.dileno.com Martin S.

    Hilarous, man!

  • Mark D

    Was that really supposed to be funny? Seriously?

    In future check out the standard of writing in papers such as the Guardian, particularly the Fiver and the daily rumours page – funny, well thought out, fantastically written articles.

  • Tom

    Not at all.

  • http://wedontknowfootball.com/ wllmhll

    haha brilliant

  • gurumaster

    Dude….plz dnt copy dirtytackle.com….also this was lame…truly abysmal

  • doesyourmotherknow

    Mark D, methinks you miss the point. try again please.

  • Ernie

    I thought I went to Off The Post but apparently I’ve been redirected to Dirty Tackle?

  • Ernie

    Oh, except if it was DT then I’d actually have laughed

  • dave

    very true. if the money grabbing basterd had any sense he would have stayed at everton where the club is run in the right way.