Lower league punts, foreign predictions, and Valentine’s plans in our sports betting round-up
Last week Punter Dan returned a profit of 23 of your English pounds. More this week, he promises:
Another week of footy, and after the crazy mental eff-up of last weekend’s Premier League it was back to Earth with the bump of international friendly week. Now normally the idea of having three current and three ex-Villa players would make me a) do one of those sicky burps and b) wonder if I was watching England circa 1992. Seemed to work ok though, and we were thankfully spared the media wrath of a non-victory. “Go home you Wop” or whatever other guttertripe our tabloids can think of.
£10 on Man United to win and Arsenal and Liverpool to win at -1.5 gets you £63
My favourite story of the week involved a mum complaining because of Nintendo Wii Countdown game giving her the word “SHITHEADS” in a conundrum. Apparently it scared her three year old who was playing the game with his mummy. That is priceless. I have been watching that show ever since the blonde took over Carol’s job, desperately crossing my fingers for a word with any sort of sexual connotation to be revealed. At 3.15 on a Tuesday, it is the only thing that will stir my loins. More importantly, what the flying eff is a three year old kid doing playing Countdown. Are they trying to breed a Robogeek capable of beating up Hawking?
£10 on Notts County, Crawley and Utrecht all to win gets you £52
And so another full year has passed, and it’s that romantic time of year again. I imagine Saint Valentine himself is turning in his grave at the genuine raping of his legacy into a ‘sell an arseloads of cards to unsuspecting uglies’ day. This year I will be rustling up some sort of Carbonara before a lovely night in front of the telly. Nothing more romantic than a West London derby, and I know Torres gets the missus in the mood.
£5 on PSV, Ross County and Elgin all to win gets you £40
£5 on QPR and Mainz to win gets you £31
£10 on Hull to win and Cardiff and Barcelona to win at -1.5 gets you £48