OTP Podcast – Episode 32: Fight! Fight! Fight!
The Premier League offered up its very own Wrestlemania at the weekend with three delightfully theatrical bouts. The Pod review and commend the undercard (Odemwingie v Foster, Balotelli vs sanity) and the big bucks main event, Roger ‘Beer Breath’ Johnson v Wayne ‘Blonde Bombshell’ Hennessey.
The in-house tremor at Molineux was a precursor to an eruption of dismay for Wolves, who look set to slowly sink into Championship obscurity. That’s one down and two to go, and with battle-hardened Wigan, QPR and Bolton all grabbing a crucial three points, we discuss the type of suction that is dragging Aston Villa down into an unwanted relegation dog-fight.
At the other end of the table, we heckle Manchester City for resolutely refusing to provide us with the ‘going to the wire’ title scrap every neutral demands. With Lee Cattermole proving himself a more complete player than David Silva and the unmasked Nicklas Bendtner made to look half-decent, an early post-mortem of the multi-million dollar choke begins in earnest.
Alongside those heavy-hitting jabs, we throw in our fair share of below the belt sucker punch questions: why can’t Darius Vassell be trusted with a power drill? What’s a better spray flavour for foot injuries, spearmint or peppermint? And what flamboyant adventures did Mick McCarthy get up to on his recent vacation to Miami?
Our unbroken monobrow of audio idiocy lays a knockout punch to highbrow journalism with the following selection of absurd clips from the global game.
Have you ever wondered what Maradona would look like if he won Wimbledon and raced up a series of centre court rows to greet his loved ones a la Pat Cash? Well this is as close as you are going to get. With the Argentine icon’s wife getting merked by opposing fans in a UAE league match-up, a heroic intervention transpires. Play alongside Enrique Iglesias’ ‘Hero’ for added romanticism.
Nobody does it better, nobody does it half as good as you – Brazil you are the best. This week the nation of nonsensical football nutjobbery also delivers a heroic intervention. Last ditch goal-line clearances are glorious to watch. Traditionally they are the preserve of tenacious centre-halves, but now ball boys are in on the act. We particularly admire the fact that he loses no time heading towards a safe house to lay low.
Picking your nose is a tricky affair – the instinctive pleasure is soon dulled by the practicalities of dispensing with the mining by-products. Next time you are caught short without a tissue, remember a Champions League child mascot is a proven and viable alternative.
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