From a bloodied scalp stapled with new hair follicles to a large quiff fluttering in the wind, the English nation has gone on a real journey with Wayne Ronney’s head topiary over the past year. The Forward is now even dabbling with various eye-catching styles.
A recent bonce-based highlight was Rooney’s hairspray goal celebration against Ukraine, a gesture he later explained as a thanks to Andy Carroll for lending him some pre-match styling product. All fun and games then. Well not quite.
Celebrity hairdresser Nicky Clarke has given the Manchester United striker a firm warning not to use Carroll’s potentially damaging hairspray again.
Kate Moss’s stylist, said: “Wayne doesn’t need serum-type stuff, unless he was aiming for that oily look, which he shouldn’t be. He should be aiming for things to have a much more even texture — either slightly matt or slightly mid-sheen.”
We can only hope and pray Wayne takes this sound advice for the Italy game and nourishes his sensitive locks accordingly. Look good, feel good, score goals. It works for Ronaldo, it will surely prove the same for our very own impossibly chiseled national icon.