Top 10 conclusions: Premier League weekend, 9-10 March
1. There’s been a robbery in north London. It appears Tottenham might have stolen Arsenal’s self-destruct button.
2. It wasn’t all doom and gloom for Spurs. Yes, they lost to Liverpool but their old boys secured an important victory over Sunderland.
3. After his stunning strike against the Black Cats, Andros Townsend has earned the right to shorten his name and assume the hallowed title: Andy Townsend.
4. Papiss Cisse benefited from a little known clause in the laws of football that says you may slap an opponent round the chops in the event that they are a Stoke City player.
5. Swansea striker Luke Moore has decided in the last couple of weeks that he doesn’t want to be a mere Premier League footnote and has reinvented himself as the new Robin Van Persie.
6. Stuart Downing has decided in the last couple of weeks that he doesn’t want to be a Liverpool flop and has reinvented himself as the new Luis Suarez.
7. Even linesmen don’t know the offside rules anymore. Just ask Swansea sub Roland Lamah.
8. Nathan Baker must have money on Aston Villa to go down: that was some own goal. Fortunately, his team-mates were able to grab two goals to give Paul Lambert’s side a vital win over Reading.
9. All the snow at Carrow Road must have got referee Mark Clattenburg feeling Christmassy. He decided to give Norwich the softest of penalties as their gift. Artur Boruc, in the Southampton goal, wasn’t feeling so generous.
10. QPR will be further in debt soon – a top-up trip to Dubai could be on the cards at this rate.