Top 10 conclusions: Premier League weekend, August 17-18
1. It’s a new era for Manchester United, but it’s the same old Robin Van Persie. Last season’s talisman started the new campaign looking like he’s in great nick.
2. Do not run across Allen McGregor’s penalty area. The Hull keeper will punch you in the head. Maybe that’s just what Fernando Torres needed.
3. The best league in the world might not have the best penalty takers in the world. Only a 50 per cent success rate from the six penalties that were awarded over the weekend.
4. The shrewdest move of the summer is Roberto Martinez to Everton – he hasn’t had to spend a penny on new ties.
5. Rickie Lambert could probably get used to the way everything seems to have gone for him in the last week. It’s as if we’re watching a movie of his life.
6. Brendan Rodgers might have done the Premier League a favour by ridding it of Daniel Sturridge’s daft celebration.
7. Bacary Sagna bounces.
8. Talk about kicking a man when he’s down. Swansea made Wayne Rooney spend most of the afternoon with his balding head pressed against a Regaine advert.
9. There’s no nice way to spend a Sunday than parked up in your tiny Audi on the Stamford Bridge touchline.
10. A below-par Arsenal being forced towards some last-minute panic buys to placate furious supporters: the Premier League truly is back.