Rob Parker | March 16, 2010
Red Devils take on quick-fire competition
What do we learn from this?
1. Ryan Giggs is still the master.
2. Wayne Rooney is actually rubbish.
3. Gary Neville must have been aiming for the corner flag.
4. Darren Fletcher is a cheat.
Rob Parker | March 16, 2010
Green and gold til you’re on the dole
A student has been sacked from his job in a Manchester United kiosk for wearing a green-and-gold scarf, he claims. Jerry Vyse, aged 20, alleges he was dismissed by his supervisor during half-time at last week’s Champions League clash with AC Milan for wearing the anti-Glazer accessory.
He says [...]
Rob Parker | March 11, 2010
Just hold me, Wayne
Gary Neville enjoyed a very homoerotic goal celebration after Wayne Rooney’s opening goal for Manchester United against AC Milan last night. All the United team wanted to dance around with the hero, but the skipper wanted to leap into his arms, rest his head against Wayne’s and just cuddle.
A truly tender moment.
[...]
Rob Parker | March 11, 2010
Goldenballs dons gold-and-green
After the disgraceful hostile reaction to his arrival on the pitch last night, David Beckham (ever the populist) sought to win back over those seething Manchester United supporters by wearing a green-and-gold Love United, Hate Glazer scarf at full-time.
They just don’t like you, David, and they can see straight through your publicity stunts. [...]
Rob Parker | March 11, 2010
It’s competition time!
Manchester United face Fulham at Old Trafford this Sunday (1.30pm kick-off) as they look to keep up momentum going in to the business end of the season.
OTP has teamed up with our pals at football-mad Betfair to offer you and a mate the chance to join the centenary celebrations at Old Trafford [...]
Rob Parker | March 9, 2010
Me, Myself and Wayne
This might initially seem to be an advert for a multiple personality disorder, but it eventually transpires that it is for an energy drink. The moral of the tale is topless people always prosper.
Rob Parker | March 1, 2010
Hair we go
Wayne Rooney reckons his recent spate of headed goals is down to his receding hairline. And hard work, of course.
Speaking ahead of yesterday’s Carling Cup final in which he scored the winner with a headed goal, Rooney said: “I’ve been working on [my heading] for the last couple of years and it’s getting [...]
