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Category: Newcastle United

Dec 21 2008

The Premier League Managers’ Christmas Lists: Joe Kinnear

Joe, Joe, Joe. Merry Christmas

Dear F***ing Santa,

This f***ing year I would like:

- A proper contract
- Chairmanship of the Press Complaints Commission
- A new f***ing swear box

Thanks,

Joe

Dec 11 2008

Kitman: Lee Clark’s ‘Sad Mackem Bastards’ t-shirt

New Huddersfield manager’s past fashion faux pas

Since Lee Clark was unveiled as Huddersfield Town’s new manager today we thought we ought to pay tribute to his playing career. Or, to be more precise, the moment he made one of football’s greatest wardrobe-related errors of judgement.

Geordie boy and former Newcastle player Clark took the not-very-well beaten track to Sunderland. But he was still a Newcastle lad at heart, and attended the 1999 FA Cup final wearing a t-shirt bearing the slogan Sad Mackem Bastards. Strangely he never played for Sunderland again…

Best of luck to Lee at the Galpharm Stadium.

Nov 07 2008

And the award for most wooden MTV award presenter goes to… Michael Owen

Like a fish out of water

Newcastle striker Michael Owen teamed up with Anastacia to present an award at the MTV Europe Awards in Liverpool last night. The (occasional) England man came face-to-face with musical legends Tokio Hotel (who?) to give them their award. He wisely left most of the talking to Anastacia.

Nov 04 2008

Joey Barton back to pushing and shoving

Ex-jailbird involved in minor on-pitch scuffle

Newcastle midfielder Joey Barton flexed his muscles during last night’s victory over Aston Villa by scuffling with renowned football hardman Gabriel Agbonlahor.

Magpies coach Chris Hughton said: “Any incident regarding Joey is going to be blown up twice as much as it’s going to be with any other player. I wasn’t aware of any incident with Joey at all.”

Oct 22 2008

Football video: Richard Dunne’s comedy own goal against Newcastle

Manchester City defender scores a cracker

This beaut comes from Monday night’s match between Newcastle and Manchester City. City’s Richard Dunne very kindly gave Newcastle the lead with this excellent finish into his own net.

Oct 09 2008

One of the Cockney Mafia Out: Tony Jimenez leaves Newcastle

Toon Army Cockney hunt working!

One of Newcastle’s so-called Cockney Mafia has left the club. Vice-president (player recruitment) Tony Jimenez has left the club “to pursue other interests”.

A statement released by Newcastle said: “Newcastle United can confirm that Tony Jimenez has left the club. Tony, who was appointed vice-president (player Recruitment) in January, has made the decision in order to pursue other interests. Newcastle United thanks Tony for all of his hard work and efforts and wishes him every success in the future.”

The former Chelsea season ticket-holder was a close ally of Dennis Wise at the club and was one of the targets of the Cockney Mafia jibes by the Toon Army during recent protests.

Oct 07 2008

Roy Kinnear is back! MSN have done it again

OK, it’s getting a bit silly now

To follow-up yesterday’s clanger from MSN, we have now found this article from last Friday in which they call Joe Kinnear - for some reason best known to themselves - Roy Kinnear. As we pointed out yesterday, Roy Kinnear is an actor who died in 1988 after falling from a horse and suffering a heart attack. Sort it out!

Oct 06 2008

Newcastle United have a new manager!

MSN appoints deceased English actor Roy Kinnear as new Magpies boss

Oops! This one slipped through the net. According to MSN, Roy Kinnear is raging at “scandalous press”. Either MSN have employed a bloody good medium to contact the actor who passed away in 1988, or someone has messed up. We would say they deserved the sack but as Juande Ramos is still in a job it is difficult to make a good case for it!

Oct 04 2008

Joe Kinnear gets Wikipedia graffiti

Internet wag defaces Kinnear’s f***ing Wiki page

Childish? Yes. Ultimately pointless? Yes. Funny? Yes!

Oct 04 2008

The Joe Kinnear Swear Diaries, Part Three

Jokin’ Ear gets paralinguistic

You have seen him swear on Football Focus, you have heard his foul-mouthed tirade against this country’s finest newspapermen, and now Newcastle caretaker boss Joe Kinnear wants to prove he can mix it up with a few hand gestures. Here he is sticking it to the man during his Nottingham Forest days. No wonder he is still serving a touchline ban from 2004!