Kitman: Lucio fails to outdo Kaka in the Jesus stakes

Rob Parker | June 29, 2009

Brazilian defender’s t-shirt not up to scratch

Sure you love him, but do you belong to him? Kaka’s smug look towards the slogan tells you he knows he is still football’s number one Christian. Meanwhile, the master revisited a previous classic. Check it out after the jump…

Top 10 conclusions USA 2-3 Brazil

Rob Parker | June 29, 2009

1. USA are not the Undisputed Global Soccerball World Series Super Champions just yet.
2. Wearing scarves needn’t prevent you winning international tournaments.
3. Brazil never know when they are supposed to be beaten.

Landon Donavan and Bob Bradley forced to squirm by Michael Jackson-obsessed journalists

Rob Parker | June 28, 2009

Isn’t this supposed to be about the Confederations Cup final?

Poor old Landon must have known there was trouble ahead from the minute the first journalist told him: “I’m going to make you a question, Donovan.” He goes on to ask what the impact of Michael Jackson’s death has been on the USA team and whether [...]

Jozy Altidore makes Joan Capdevila eat his words

Rob Parker | June 24, 2009

USA stun Spain to reach Confederations Cup final

Remember we told you that Spain full-back Joan ‘Rivers’ Capdevila had taken a bit of a pop at the USA’s Jozy Altidore? Just to refresh your memory, Capdevila said of his Villarreal team-mate: “Yesterday he sent me a message and told me that we had to be careful. [...]

USA fire off badly worded pre-match text messages to Spain

Rob Parker | June 24, 2009

European champions think they are supposed to be scared…

Spain laughed off a pre-Confederations Cup semi-final warning SMS by attributing it to poor language skills. USA forward Jozy Altidore sent a text to Villarreal team-mate Joan ‘Rivers’ Capdevila urging the hot favourites to watch their backs. Naturally, the Spaniards assumed something had been lost in translation.
Capdevila [...]

Video: Fat kid enjoys Italy 0-3 Brazil by rubbing ice cream over his face

Rob Parker | June 22, 2009

Not shown: the moment South Africa’s insect population descends on his face

Gordon Strachan travelled to the Confederations Cup to network for a new job but faced with the possibilty of watching another half hour of Brazil thrashing Italy or coating his face with an ice-cream, the cooling dessert was always going to win.
Spotted on 101GG

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Confederations Cup Group B shows why we love football… sort of

Rob Parker | June 22, 2009

Proof it’s just 11 v 11, football matches aren’t played on paper and more cliches

Football is a mixed up game, and results in Group B of the Confederations Cup only serve to prove that. It is probably fair to say that Brazil were the best team in the group having won all three of their [...]