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Jan 07 2009

Football video: Jermain Defoe’s return to Spurs parade and interview

Jermain’s big comeback

We know how strongly Tottenham fans feel about players who string along and betray their clubs. That is why Portsmouth turncoat Jermain Defoe was subjected to a barrage of homophobic and vindictive abuse at White Hart Lane last night. Or not.

Defoe was presented on the pitch before Spurs’ 4-1 Carling Cup victory over Burnley last night. He also gave an interview explaining the reasons for his return. Pompey fans: choose your own doses of salt to take it with!

Jan 06 2009

Jermain Defoe’s FA Cup sicknote

Tottenham-bound striker’s legit excuse

Being a bit of a cynic, it was a relief to see that Jermain Defoe has not being screwing Portsmouth and undermining the value of the FA Cup. Now that Tottenham have had a bid for the 26-year-old accepted, they have released Defoe’s sicknote to prove there were no underhand tactics afoot.

Click the image to enlarge.

Jan 03 2009

Football video: Hossam Ghaly stopped from making sub appearance by Spurs boo-boys

Harry Redknapp backs out of controversial substitution

Tottenham manager Harry Redknapp was forced to scrap a planned substitution in Friday night’s FA Cup win against Wigan amid fears the swap would disrupt his side’s momentum. Hossam Ghaly has not played for the club since throwing a tantrum (and his shirt) when substituted by Martin Jol in a match against Blackburn in May 2007.

s Sol Campbell will testify, the White Hart Lane faithful are not the most forgiving folks, and last night they showed Ghaly that he was still in their bad books. Ordered by Redknapp to strip off his tracksuit for a 10-minute comeback appearance, Ghaly faced a barrage of boos as he waited to join the action. This prompted Redknapp to tell the Egyptian to put his tracksuit back on and return to the bench.
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Dec 11 2008

Giovani Dos Santos gets wasted at the Tottenham Christmas party

Mexican youngster lies on floor to minimise vomit trajectory

Juande Ramos’ nutritional expectations for his squads are notoriously strict, so perhaps that explains why one or two Spurs players had lost track of their alcohol threshold when Harry Redknapp sent them out for a good old-fashioned Christmas party.

Take Mexican youngster Giovani Dos Santos, for instance. He has about as much impact on the Premier League as a Roy Keane signing, but has finally made some headlines today. The ex-Barcelona player was photographed in the process of falling to the floor, throwing up and being bundled into a cab.

Without the festive spirit of the Christmas party, how else would footballers be photographed in this state, get mugged or be accused of rape?

Spotted on 101GreatGoals

Dec 09 2008

Juande Ramos has a job! At Real Madrid! Bernd Schuster sacked!

Well, the first two exclamation marks were merited

Real Madrid’s stars are today gorging themselves on fast food and tapas before their baby food diet kicks in tomorrow (probably). Spurs reject and serial punchline Juande Ramos has been named as the temporary replacement of sacked Real boss Bernd Schuster.

The ex-Sevilla manager, who failed to win a Premier League game with Spurs this season, is charged with turning around Real’s fortunes ahead of a potentially disastrous El Clásico match at Barcelona this weekend.
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Nov 27 2008

Football Lookalikes: Heurelho Gomes and The BFG

Big Fumbling Gomes

Spotted on the weekly cauldron of schoolboy jokes that is the Guardian Gallery.

Nov 21 2008

Harry ‘I Trust Heuelho Gomes’ Redknapp recalls Ben Alnwick from loan

What Harry says and what Harry does

Earlier this week, Spurs manager Harry Redknapp came out in defence of under-fire keeper Heurelho Gomes. Redknapp said: “He’s our number one so he’s got to do the job - we’re relying on him heavily. I believe in him and we have to believe in him.”

Rough translation: our reserve keeper (Cesar Sanchez) is even worse so it looks like I will have to keep picking him until January.

Redknapp has now recalled young keeper Ben Alnwick from his loan spell at Carlisle United. So to clarify, the Tottenham boss - who has no intention of dropping ‘Safehands’ Gomes - has cut short some guaranteed first-team football for a 21-year-old keeper to make him third-choice at White Hart Lane. That makes sense.

Nov 20 2008

The man behind Heurelho Gomes’ string of clangers gets the chop

No, not Gomes himself - the other man behind his mistakes

Yesterday, our friends at The Spoiler were mulling over the Premier League’s top scapegoats. As if by way of response (perhaps they were unhappy at no longer being the butt of quite so many jokes) Tottenham today ‘parted company’ with goalkeeping coach Hans Leitert.
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Nov 08 2008

‘Do Are Ya? Vedran Corluka’s beard

Croatian comes up with excuse not to shave

Superstitious Spurs full-back Vedran Corluka has vowed not to shave as long as his side remain unbeaten under Harry Redknapp. The Croatian - who wouldn’t have found it too difficult to keep clean-shaven under Juande Ramos - has been letting his beard grow since Redknapp’s first game in charge.

Corluka said: “When the new manager arrived I told him I wouldn’t shave if we didn’t lose. After we beat Bolton. our first win this season. I didn’t shave. Then I said I’d do the same if we didn’t lose to Arsenal. Now I’ve almost got a beard.”

His former club, Manchester City, have the opportunity to inflict the old Gillette on his tomorrow.

Spotted on The Sun

Nov 02 2008

Harry, Jamie and Louise Redknapp have fun on the Nintendo Wii

Spurs boss is closet gamer

How do you rewind after a hard day at the office as saviour of Tottenham Hotspur? Call round to your son’s house for a quick game on the Wii, of course. If you can get the daughter-in-law involved, even better.

Spotted on 101GreatGoals