Euro 2012 alternative team guide: Russia
10 word description: Euro 2008 semi-finalist, Mother Russia, visits stepkids hoping for repeat.
Coach: Dick Advocaat
The vastly experienced former Rangers boss steps down after Euro 2012 to takeover at PSV Eindhoven. He’ll be hoping to go out with a bang in his first and only international tournament since taking over from Guus Hiddink in 2010.
Star man: Andrey Arshavin
His stock has never been higher than at Euro 2008. But it’s been pretty much downhill since then. Still a quality player on his day, he’ll be hoping to recapture some of the magic and kickstart his career.
Prem connections: Andrey Arshavin (Arsenal), Pavel Pogrebnyak (Fulham). Plus Yuri Zhirkov (formerly of Chelsea) and Roman Pavlyuchenko (ex-Spurs)
Comedy name potential: Arshavin, Alexander Kokorin, Yuri Zhirkov.
Fun country fact: Get out your St George’s crosses: he’s also the patron saint of Moscow.
Anthem / rating: National Anthem of the Russian Federation / 7 out of 10
Unmistakably Russian. Undeniably patriotic. Probably does its job on that basis.